Truly Disgusting

So there has been a lot of talk this week about the new PETA commercial featuring ladies in lingerie posing with vegetables, and the fact that NBC rejected that ad as too racy to air. This just annoyes me. In fact, it angers me, because the ad looks the same as Victoria Secret ads which are allowed to air during normal hours. The only difference I can see is that this add actually has a message, and I think that the fact that it is PETA's message makes mainstream old conservative fussy dumb ass business people dislike it from the word go, whereas they probably rewind and watch Victoria Secret's commercials over and over. But disgusting censorship is not the point of this post, and neither are disgusting old men. No, the point of this post is disgusting Arby's ads!

The Arby's ad that I have posted here weirds me out in the extremely extreme. I has since it started airing a month or two ago. If I am alone watching tv, I change the channel until it's over. If I am watching with Mr. Jeff, I walk away. It's just...creepy. It sort of embarrasses me. Anyway, I was listening to the radio when a discussion of the PETA ad started, and a girl called in to say that if they can air this creepy Arby's ad, then they should be able to air the PETA ad, and I was like, YES. This ad is so frickin creepy! Pull this ad! Somebody start a petition.

This is some Benjamin Button's shit!

Alright, I know that Kanye was talking about something else, but I love this phrase. To me it means anything unnatural. Anyway. So we know that this woman from California just had 8 babies. This is just more evidence, as we all know, that this is the end of days. In short, this is some Benjamin Button shit.

I don't like it when people mess with nature, and frankly I don't think that God likes it either. And so He punishes you. The lady from California did not have babies, she had a litter. There is something animalistic about having that many babies at once. Certainly it is not naturally human. Human’s normally have one child at a time and occasionally two. Having more than 3 children at once naturally is basically unheard of for humans and it's a crime against nature. You know, no big deal. The babies weigh between 1 pound, 8 ounces, and 3 pounds, 4 ounces. They probably looked like little rodent babies. Like animals. She is punished by having her house turned into a zoo. You know, I believe that people should be able to do whatever they want. I just believe that they should not want this.

Added: The lovely and talented Meredith F. Small, anthropologist at Cornell University, seems to agree that having octoplets is ducked up. She writes:

Eight kids at once. The mind boggles. The mind is also pretty creeped out by the thought of one tiny baby after another coming out of a woman as if she were a mouse. It's great those octuplets are here and healthy, but really, humans aren't designed to have litters.

Read her article here.

Daily Lansbury

Excellent things have been happening right under my nose and I didn’t even know it. I am so excited I can hardly contain myself. There was finally an episode of NCIS that featured McGee! Much maligned, McGee is actually an excellent, funny and charming part of NCIS, so it is about time that he got his own episode. And not only did he get his own episode, he got a rad one with a great storyline: McGee gets detained at a women’s prison during the murder of a guard and the subsequent riot. Then, as things progress, the ladies feel that McGee is the only one they can trust and they tell him that he has to solve the crime! The prisoners want the murderer found so that they will not all be blamed for the crime. It was a really a great episode, made even better by the fact that THIS IS THE EXACT SAME THING THAT HAPPENED ON ONE OF THE GREATEST “MURDER, SHE WROTE” EPISODE EVER!!!!!!!

I am so serious. Both about the fact that this episode story line is eternally entertaining and about the fact that the episode is pretty much word for word the same as the “Murder, She Wrote” where Jessica gets stuck in the prison and is the only one the inmates feel they can trust. It is the same even down to the supposed reason that the murder of the guard took place: drugs being dealt inside the jail by the staff.

And there are even the same inmate characters in there: the jumpy leader, probably of immigrant heritage, ready to take on all comers, determined not to go down with out a fight. The inmate that has found God and takes responsibility for what she did. The woman who killed her abusive boyfriend. It goes on and on. Excellently. Love it.

Daily Photo

Photo by Kevin Pieper, AP

Daily Lansbury

The theme for the day is dlisted references to my favorite things. Since we've already had our Golden Girls references, let's get Lansbury too! From March 29th, 2007:

TMZ reports that Howard K. Stern has temporarily halted the inquest into Daniel Smith's death. The inquest has been put on hold by a judge for at least two weeks. An all-women jury had already been selected, but Howard's lawyer argued that the inquest was flawed.

He said it's impossible to find an inpartial jury due to all the media attention surrounding the case. Howie's lawyer will now go to the supreme court of the Bahamas to try and get the inquest blocked for good.

Why does Howard care? Because he probably is hiding something and doesn't want it to come out. Get Angela Lansbury on this case, because something's fishy.

Daily Golden Girls

I'm sorry, I know this photo is old, but I just love it. This is an outfit only a Dorothy Zbornak could love. And look hot in.
Comment from dlisted:
WOULD YOU HIT IT?
Hell yes I'd hit it! I only say this, because I have a Dorothy Zbornak fantasy and Dorothy would definitely rock the shit out of this ensemble. She would even wear those nurse shoes with the little hearts on them that you can change the color. I know she's not a nurse, but I would always see her in that shit. Comfort first. You know Dorothy was a total dom in bed. She was probably into whipping and sick shit like enema play. I don't play that, but I'd let Dorothy slap the shit out of me.
I'm pretty sure Will Ferrell wasn't going for the Dorothy Zbornak look. I think he's channeling Shaq. Here he is at the Semi-Pro premiere.

Goo Heffner

So, I am watching the True Hollywood Story of Hugh Heffner. It is sort of... pathetic? He really should never have let all this out. The basic theme so far is that affection from loose women is a replacement for the affection he never got from his mother or father. And that he was very shaped by early rejection by girls. Hhhmmm...so...Mommy issues plus problems with women equals Playboy. It's even more sad and women-hating then it at first seemed. Oh, also, in high school he illustrated an autobiographical comic strip where he called himself "Goo Heffner."

Hey there little lady

T9

The predictive texting on my cell phone is something that I didn't use for a while, but now it is definitely the way I text. It sucks because I use made up words a lot, and that takes longer to type with the T9. But most other texting goes faster. And another thing it has going for it, it makes me laugh. Like when I try to text "fat," but "eat" pops up as the first option. Very clever, T9.

Daily Photo

Tomorrow makes one week.

Daily Lansbury

Again, I am sorry that I missed blogging over Christmas, because this would have fit in perfectly. However, let's pretend that this is timely, shall we? Not only does this feature the lovely voice of Lansbury, it also comments on women's issues!

Daily Golden Girls

One of the strangest things I have ever seen, courtesy of Aunt Candy. I can;t explain it so I won't try. But once you've watched it, riddle me this: why so much uglier as Sophia?

I'm in!

Yes, yes, yes. I like this idea.

Daily Lansbury

Just thought I'd share the back cover of my new favorite book.

N!C!I!S!!!!!!!!!

NCIS! I just watched the first episode that I have seen since...well, I think since before I started my new job. About 2 months maybe. I have them DVRed, and I went back close to where I left off. Christmas episode! It was excellent. I love Christmas, and it was nice to have it back for a minute. I also love NCIS, and it was nice to have that back, too. And in the spirit of Christmas, Gibbs was semi-trusting and semi-emotive in this episode. Good for a change, just don't make a habit out of it, NCIS. P.S. I love posting this promo pic on my blog like it's not creepy, because I so think it is in real life.

Daily Golden Girls

I was just browsing the wikipedia entry on the Golden Girls and there is a section on "Continuity" that talks about inconsistencies that exist in the series. This interests me because I HATE THEM. The one that I hate most is the inconsistency surrounding Blanche's children. They are always saying that she has more or less of them. And I tell you she does not have a son named Skippy! Even though sometimes the show says she does! And what is the reason they give for the inconsistencies?

According to executive producer Mark Sotkin, the main reason for this is that a new writing staff took over after the third season, and they simply missed details from the previous seasons.

What the frickin frack! Does the sound like a legitimate reason for well paid professionals on the best sitcom ever in TV history to not know their stuff? No, it does not. If they had just watched each previous episode, say, three or four time, which is not hard then they would not have ducked up and aggravated my brain.

Violent? Disrespectful? Funny? Really Funny? You decide.

I don't want to love this, but I do.

Daily Photo

Today is probably the happiest day of her life. It's funny how I've softened to her over the years.

Daily Lansbury

So, I started really reading Angela Lansbury's Positive Moves: My Personal Plan for Fitness and Well-Being in earnest last night. The dust jacket tells us that this book was "inspired by her best-selling videotape of the same name and speaks directly about all the most sensitive issues that change and evolve as we grow older. From femininity and sexuality to self image and self confidence, her gentle wisdom and practical suggestions read like a conversation with a close and trusted friend." Hell yes they do! It is quite good, and wouldn't you know it, it really mirrors my own feelings about health and wellbeing! It also contains some amazing pictures of young Lansbury that I have never seen before!

Daily Golden Girls

Michelle Collins over at the Best Week Ever Blog actually owns both of these necklaces, one hot, one not. She asked her readers which necklace should "rule [her] ironic accessory roost?" I have just one thing to say about that: Ironic WHAT? Only one of those necklaces should even be considered in the ironic jewelry discussion, and you better know which one it is. The other one of those necklaces is a stone cold piece of hot, and it can easily be taken out for special dress up events OR worn lovingly and sentimentally as your everyday necklace. Obviously.

Daily Photo

Photo by Georgia B. See more on her blog, here.

Disappointing!

I feel your pain, Mariah.

We are all going to get brain cancer from our phones

Now, I'm not claiming that we are all going to die of this. No doubt some of us will be the victim of violent crime, gunned down long before a slow acting tumor takes us. Some of us might die in freak accidents, or less freaky car accidents. But I do think that we need to start doing something about cell phone use. Dr. Sanjay Gupta says that he always uses an ear piece blue tooth thingy when using his cell phone because of the chance of brain tumors caused by cell phone use. Now Dr. Weil has weighed in:

Should you be worried about your cell phone causing cancer? We don’t really know yet. Formal studies on potential cell phone hazards have been contradictory - some find a link between cell phone use and brain tumors and some do not - and it seems prudent to me to take common sense precautions. Brain tumors can take 30 to 40 years to develop, so it could be a long time before we know for sure whether cell phone use is safe or, if not, how great the risks may be.

I recommend:

1. Using earpieces, headsets or speakerphone mode.
2. Saving long conversations for conventional phones.
3. In your car, using a cell phone that has a remote antenna located outside the vehicle.
4. Limiting the time children spend on cell phones - they may be more vulnerable than adults to adverse effects.
5. Finding out how much radiofrequency energy your cell phone emits. Called the SAR measurement (Specific Absorption Rate), 1.6 watts per kilogram is currently what is permitted in the United States. Visit the Federal Communications Commission Web site for more information.

January.

I have to admit that January is getting old. I need things to get moving. I feel stuck, and stressed, and unsure, and I just generally need things to start heading in the direction of February and March, when I've convinced myself that things will surely be different. So I couldn't agree more with this recent blog post by Matt Bitz, explaining how January, Wednesdays, and the knowledge that you are going to die some day, all suck. I have to admit that actually November is generally the month were I freak out about how we are all going to die, but I get how you could feel that way in January, too. Honestly, I get how you could feel that way in June, but let's not make this about me.

What the duck?

We all know that Kim Zolciak's hair looks like that, and I think that we knew about her lips, too. But her eyebrows? I swear to God they were made out of hair last time I looked.

Going Away Party

Well, we don't know for sure if the apartment is going to rent or not, but I think we pretty much have to move away now. The apartment is trashed, the neighbors are probably annoyed, and we had a very good time. At least I did. We missed those of you who couldn't be there with us, but it's probably better that the list of witnesses for this night stayed relatively small.

All those shots were for Jackie! I tried to tell her to think of the baby, but she just kept demanding shot after shot. So finally I just set a big tray of them next to her, and after that she seemed fine.


The rest of us didn't have any shots, as you can tell.

Daily Golden Girls/Daily Lansbury

I love these two ladies, and I love that they love each other. You must see the other pictures on the Best Week Ever blog post about Bea being inducted into the Academy of Television Sciences Hall of Fame.

Hey!

Shoot!

Can;t believe that I missed opening weekend! Oh well, I guess I'll just go see "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" next weekend. It was the number one movie this weekend though! And yes, I am really going to see it I think. Jeff has been talking about it for a week or two. He thinks Kevin James is funny. I was like, your a big fan of The King of Queens? But apparently his stand up is funny or something. Whateva. I'll see most anything if it doesn;t have Angelina Jolie in it.

Daily Photo

You don't know how sad I am that I was not blogging over the holiday's, when the Season's Greetings sign would have been more appropriate. However! It's still January and close to the New Year, and also, I guess it's always a season. Anyway, this is the town where I was born. Actually, this town was too small to have a hospital, so I was born in Danbury, CT, so I guess that it would be more accurate to say that Bethel, CT is the town where I was brought home to directly after I was born. Joe was brought home to Bethel, too. I don't remember these signs, but here's what my Dad writes about them:

Signs on the side of the Dante Vaghi Woodworking Company of Bethel, Connecticut. Located in Downtown Bethel, just next to the train station.These wre taken with my Olymus OM-1n back in about 1988, the negatives scanned and the resulting shots severely cropped to focus only on the signs. I lived in Bethel throughout the 1980s, and with my wife, Vicki, we started our family here. I did not know Mr. Vaghi, but I agree with his intention to welcome all beings to our world with love and in peace!

You really must go and see the other pictures, here. More great signs from the store. I especially love the "Open Letter To All The World, U.F.O's Do Exist."

Daily Lansbury

Let's talk Murder, She Wrote. Let's talk J.B. Fletcher. No, I know, let's kind of combine those things and then end up talking about people who are even crazier about MSW and J.B. than me. I give you this entry from the Jessica Fletcher wikipedia page:

Figuring out J.B. Fletcher's birthday is a mystery in itself. In the episode "Dead Heat" (Season 2, Episode 8, originally broadcasted Sunday, November 24, 1985), Jessica is asked what her astrological sign is, to which she answers that she is a "Pisces, the last time I looked", which means that she had to be born sometime between February 19 and the vernal equinox around March 20.

In the episode "To The Last Will I Grapple With Thee" (Season 8, Episode 17, originally broadcasted Sunday, March 15, 1992), Jessica receives a birthday cake from her friend, Sean Cullane, earlier in the day, and celebrates her birthday with him that evening at Fenian's Chase Irish Pub, where Jessica has the Tuesday Special for dinner. Tuesday, March 17, 1992 is St Patrick's Day, and St. Patrick's Day is in the astrological sign of Pisces. However, there is some difficulty with this conclusion as no one in the episode wishes anyone a Happy St. Patrick's Day, something hard to believe would not happen in an Irish pub in New York City on St. Patrick's Day.

As well, Jessica Fletcher's maiden name is McGill, which may be a reference to Angela Lansbury's own mother, Moyna MacGill. The writers may have wished to extend the Irish connection established with her maiden name, by suggesting her birthday is the feast day of St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland.

Another possible birthday for Jessica is November 21, which would make her birth sign probably Sagittarius, possibly Scorpio, but contradicts the information Jessica has given about herself. No age is given for Jessica in either of the two episodes mentioned above, so calculating a year is not yet possible.

Personally, I love this entry, as I had tried unsuccessfully to figure out J.B. birthday before. I knew that her maiden name was McGill, and that that was her Lansbury's mothers name, but that never led me to believe that her birthday was St. Patricks' Day. But it's all coming to gether for me now, thanks to some freaky person with just enough time on their hands.

Daily Golden Girls

Happy Birthday Betty White! And here is a little Betty White/Golden Girls trivia:
Betty is the only Golden Girl ever to appear on 4 different shows as the same character: The Golden Girls, Empty Nest, The Golden Palace, Nurses. More Betty trivia here.

Same crapola, different book.

The basic point of this post boils down to this: The Tenth Circle is just as bad as The Ice Storm. Goddam but I hated that book. I read The Ice Storm by one Rick Moody who I have no idea why people found him so cool and hipster because his book was pedestrian as well as pedophilic, and now I am listening to The Tenth Circle on CD while I drive to and from work. I can;t tell if I hate The Tenth Circle in the same way because the comparison is off since I am listening to it and the readers voice annoys me. But also I am pretty sure that I dislike the whole book. Just like in The Ice Storm there is somethings wildly disfunctional in the relationship between the adults, and something downright creepy in the realationships between the adults and the children, not to mention between the authors and children. Anyway, that shit is wack but I'm going to finish it out. I'll let you know if it gets better.

I do kind of want to see the movie of The Ice Storm, though. But I bet if it is good then Rick Moody never got his paws on it! Let me give you a little recap of The Ice Storm via Wikipedia: "The story focuses on a brief period of time when a major ice storm hits their town of New Canaan, Connecticut, just as both families are melting down from the parents' alcoholism, escapism and adultery, and their children's drug use and sexual experimentation." Stupid escapism and children's drug use, always happening at the same time. And of course the families are affluent. Anyway, I just want everyone to know that I am a fan of dysfunction in stories,
and I have read "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf" four times, but The Ice Storm is some fakery.

Best Commercial. Ever?

So I am watching Spike TV, as is my way, and I see a great commercial. It is an ad for some night when they are playing beat-em-up movies, both Jean Claude Van Dam and Steven Seagal. I am going to try to transcribe the commercial for you, because you will love it.

This is all said my a voice over with a total WWE announcer voice.

"Tomorrow. Two Titans of Testosterone go toe to toe.
One, an ice cold killer with the heart of a poet." (This is Seagal, of course.)
"The other, a warrior chiseled from stone.
A deadly force with a powerful pony tail versus a an icon of Euro-style je no se kick ass.
Both old school, both hard core, and ready for a battle."

Or something along those lines. Amazing.

Daily Lansbury

Guess what I got for Christmas from Aunt Candy? That's right! Angela Lansbury's Positive Moves: My Personal Plan for Fitness and Well-Being! It's obviously a hot book. It is where Angela answers questions like, "How do you manage to have so much energy?" and "How do you continue to look so vital?" I do want to know the answers to these questions, and I am not being ironic at all. Want to know the answers? Guess you'll just have to buy the book sucka! No, j/k, I will post the can;t miss tidbits later in the week, of course. I just love you like that.

Daily Golden Girls

Sophia: Sticks and stones may break your bones, but cement pays homage to tradition.

Au Revoir!

So I said goodbye to my dirty goddam french press a few weeks ago. I knew my parents were going to get me an automatic coffee maker for Christmas, so of course my french press SHATTERED on me 10 days before Christmas. I was mad for a moment, but then I remembered that I hated it. So I threw it in the garbage and for a while I was just dumping coffee in boiling water and letting it boil for a minute and straining it. Not bad.

And then I got my new maker. It is lovely, it has it's own filter to purify the water so I can just use tap water, and best of all, I set it so that it is already made by the time I get up. I LOVE IT.

The funny thing is, and the thing that I am only going to admit here where no one will read it, is that I miss my wonky french press. I miss the flavor. But don't tell my french press.